Transcript: Simple Steps to Building True Confidence

THIS IS AN AUTOMATED TRANSCRIPT … PLEASE FORGIVE ANY TYPOS!

Scott: [00:00:00] I would say try and gain as much clarity as possible in where you're going. Yeah, because clarity builds confidence. When you know where you're going and you've got a good picture, then you do tend to hold your shoulders back and your head a bit higher, because if someone says, what? What are you doing?

Scott: Well, I'm doing this. It's just, it just allows us to feel much more confident. 

Katie: Welcome to Take a Beat, a podcast dedicated to career pivoters and those who are wanting to pause on the hustle, get clear on your direction, and head toward the light that you envision. Today's episode is an interview with Scott Hardiman, a transformational mindset and confidence coach who helps men in particular overcome fear, negative thinking, and self-doubt.

Katie: He's here today to share more of his own story and how he personally overcame low confidence and anxiety that had impacted every aspect of his life, including work and relationships. While he doesn't promise a one size fits all or overnight solution, Scott shares some of the strategies [00:01:00] that he's used and what he now uses with clients to help them move through this process of change via things like disentangling identity from achievement, changing your inner dialogue, finding clarity and more.

Katie: Take a listen, hear more of Scott's take on building confidence from the inside out. So I know that you, you describe yourself as a men's confidence and transformational coach. How did you get started in that line of work? What made you wanna go in that direction? 

Scott: I think Mo, I think maybe a lot of people resonate with this, but I was, yeah, most of the reason that people would start something is because they're in pain or they're struggling and, and I was, yeah, I had a lot of low confidence, a lot of anxiety, and for me, I suffered with that for a long period of time.

Scott: I'd say five years. Pretty crippling. I was, I was, I would say, low in confidence for most of my, my life, to be fair. But it took me a while to, to really go, okay, well I need to make a, make a change here. And it took that pain to, to give me [00:02:00] that kick to go ahead and do what I needed to do. And then I just dived into the world of personal development.

Scott: It wasn't something I'd ever been exposed to. But I went into it and I enjoyed it. I started reading books. I think I started with the first book. It's still up here somewhere yet, uh, Tony Robbins awakened the Giant Within. It's one of those, those books, I'd never heard of Tony Robbins before. And I thought, yeah, I'm gonna look into it.

Scott: And I read it. I didn't finish it, but it was enough for me to go, oh, I enjoy this. This is fun. So I started to take myself outta the hole I was in, gradually took me longer than I would've liked. But I did and I thought, wow, I've got something here. Let's see if I can help other people. 'cause I was quite passionate about that and, and now I'm here years and years later doing what I do.

Katie: Was there sort of a moment for you when you realized I wanted the change? Like that you talk about the pain, if you're comfortable sharing, was there sort of a breakthrough moment or like, I wanna do something different. 

Scott: Yeah, well, my confidence was showing up in so many different ways, and my lack of confidence, I should say, was showing up in [00:03:00] so many different ways in the sport.

Scott: I was, I was playing, I was playing rugby, and I was never able to really perform at my best, but I was, I had the potential to be really, really good. And yeah, I, I didn't allow myself that and my confidence was, wasn't allowing me to, to do what I wanted to do. I wasn't able to progress in my career in, in the way that I wanted.

Scott: I would hold myself back. And it wasn't until I got to, like I mentioned, the anxiety, which was crippling for me. It was very physical symptoms, so I needed to, I felt like I needed to take a nice deep breath in, and if I couldn't get it, then it would send me down a spiral of anxiety attacks ultimately. So for, for me, it was.

Scott: That was the pain. And I remember I was out with, for a meal with my, with my wife. We, it wasn't a comfortable situation for me anyway, to go out and be around. It was a noise and the, the busyness of the, the situation. And we went out for a meal before going to the cinema and, and I had a, a, a panic attack in, and we had to come out of the, out of the restaurant and I was just in Cambridge, in the uk [00:04:00] just in a, just in the right mess to be honest.

Scott: Uh, and that was the trigger point. That was the moment of like, wow, I can't continue here and do this. Anymore. So that was when I started to look into personal development, and that was the beginning of my journey really. Yeah. 

Katie: And it sounds like you found Tony Robbins and potentially other people along that line.

Katie: Were there specific things that you were doing then to help to build your confidence from there? 

Scott: I tried anything and everything, I'll be honest. Uh, and what I say to my clients now is that if something works great, if it doesn't work great because there's plenty of other things that we can do and can try.

Scott: I, I, for me specifically, it was a lot around language. I understood that the, the language I was using, my self-talk, my negative self-talk was extremely negative. It was limiting me in so many different ways. So that was the one of the first things I changed. It was, okay, what am I saying to myself? I need to raise my awareness because.

Scott: I suppose I, I genuinely thought I was an aware guy and I really wasn't. [00:05:00] I didn't have a clue what I was thinking, so once I started to raise my awareness, I was able to then obviously challenge that and take responsibility for it. But I think initially when my awareness was, was heightened, when I started to make an effort, it was just awareness.

Scott: It didn't really shift much for me. It was like, oh, now I kind of, now I know why I'm not where I want to be. Or I'm like, I'm low in confidence, or I'm anxious. That awareness on its own. As much as it's great, it doesn't really create the change. So it wasn't until I really took responsibility and and implemented things then that I started to see change.

Scott: So awareness was great, but on its own it wasn't. So I really had to to shift there. And now I use a statement and it's limiting language, at least to a limited life, and that was a really big moment for me when I started to change the language I was using. 

Katie: Outta curiosity because it can be difficult to raise your awareness, especially around something that is difficult maybe to confront within yourself or to to acknowledge within yourself.

Katie: What did you do to help raise your awareness? [00:06:00] 

Scott: Yeah, the fir first step is, and this isn't ideal for everybody, but I often get this, and this as being the first step with my clients as well. I really encourage them to try and do this even for a few days to, I, I ask 'em to do it for two weeks. Um, but it, it kind of, the intensity goes up and then it tapers off.

Scott: But what that is, is literally just try and catch and write down what I'm thinking and understanding. Actually, if I feel a certain way, it's often because I've missed a thought. If I catch my feeling quickly enough, if, oh, I'm frustrated. What was I thinking just then? What was I thinking? Do I have an idea of what it is?

Scott: And that practice, the more that we practice, the more we make progress. So the first thing is really try and, and as best as possible, go through the day and think, what am I thinking? What am I thinking? And then write it down because that practice will get will, it will improve. 

Katie: What helped you stay accountable to yourself?

Katie: Once you took responsibility? Uh, what helped you to be accountable then? 

Scott: I did a lot of it on my own to start with, to be honest. So I I, I was [00:07:00] the kind of guy and I still am that I'm, I can, if I commit to something, I, I do like to, to go into it. So if I say I'm going to make a change and I'm gonna put all my oil into it, I will.

Scott: You know, I, I'm a, I'm a vegetarian and I, my, I remember it's a different story, but this kind of gives you an idea of what commitment looks like. But my, my mum read a book. And she said, oh, read, read this. This is, it is about, um, animals and how we, you know, eating meat and so on. So I was like, oh, I don't really want to, 'cause I, I, I love eating meat.

Scott: What are you talking about? But I read it and then I, I was like, okay, fair enough. My wife read it as well and she was like, we'll just, we'll just cut down on the meat. We won't eat as much of it. And um, my mom actually started eating meat again. I was like, thanks for that. Uh, but. We, we stopped eating meat.

Scott: And it, it is not for any huge particular reason. It was just, are we committed to it? And, you know, five years later, that's still the case. That's a bit of a, a strange example, but [00:08:00] for me it was just, I'm committing to this. I'm gonna give it my all and I'm gonna go all in. I'm going to take responsibility.

Scott: And then that started to make a shift. I started to open my eyes to, to what's available and the support that's out there. And then naturally I started to look for. People that I could resonate with and, and share my story with. And, and that's where I came across other coaches and other mentors as well.

Scott: And they helped me stay on the track that I'm on now. 

Katie: Well, I guess somewhat in line with that, or branching off of that, when you're helping others, what, what are some practical steps that people can start to take in their own lives? Or what do you suggest when people do wanna make a big change like that?

Scott: It does vary depending on the person, but something that I like to do is if I'm not fully where I'd like to be and I wanna make change. Then I have to check in and go, am I afraid of something? Am I making assumptions? Or am I looking at the facts? Am I looking at the facts of the situation? So really nice exercise that I like to do is assumptions and fears versus facts.

Scott: [00:09:00] So you would think of an experience that perhaps isn't going the way that you want it to, to go, or you want to explore. So it could be in career, you know, I, I, I want to get this job in this specific industry, but I haven't been in this industry before. So that could be the experience. And the assumption you could be having is I haven't received any.

Scott: Reply to my cv, they don't like it. Well, that's just an assumption. That's, that's just a, a, a fear. Whereas the fact is I'm waiting for a response. And then what that does is it takes us into our logical brain and then we can start to think more clearly, uh, and look at solutions rather than come from a place of lack and, and fear and that, that drive our actions.

Scott: So that's one thing that I would, I would tend to do is start to look, what am I fearing? What am I assuming? Because that's not fact. And it tends to cloud our judgment. And then I would say try and gain as much clarity as possible in where you're going. Yeah. Because clarity builds confidence when you know where you're going and you've got a good picture.

Scott: Then you do tend to hold your shoulders back and [00:10:00] your head a bit higher because if someone says, what, what are you doing? Well, I'm doing this. It's just, it just allows us to feel much more confident. Uh, and then also, like I said earlier, language, what are you saying? You know, make sure it's more positive, it's dripping into the subconscious that actually things are good and, and you can achieve what you wanna achieve and feel confident in that.

Katie: Do you see, given that you work, it sounds like a lot with men, do you see common blocks to shifting or making a change or transformation for them? Or what are some common ones that you tend to come across? 

Scott: Yeah, so I mean, my, my. Role as a coach has, has, has adapted and evolved as I've gone through the, the journey and, and now I, I'm, I do help a lot of high achievers, you know, where they want to push on and reach that, that kind of next step or adapt their way of living.

Scott: And I suppose the barriers that I tend to see, one is tying identity to their achievement. So what we need to really understand there is, [00:11:00] okay, we need to believe that our worth. Is not dependent on our success. So that's the one of the, the biggest barriers and, and the challenges that these, these guys will, will have because they've just gone, I'm gonna do, do, do, I'm gonna do all this work and I'm gonna achieve these things 'cause that'll make me feel better, uh, that will make me feel worthy and so on.

Scott: Um, another couple of barriers would be. Fear was slowing down. I remember having a client and I said, well, that's this. You, you seem to be coming from a place of fear and you've done really well. You've achieved such success because you've been coming from that, that place. But for me, that's, you could class as that, as an unhealthy place.

Scott: So let's put you in a healthy state. And he said, yeah, but what if I stop? Achieving the things that I've achieved because I'm now coming from a healthy place. And I said, well, it's not, it doesn't work like that because you're gonna be, have a clearer mind, you'll feel more positive. And you tell me if you're more positive and you've got more clarity, are you more likely to do the things that you wanna do?

Scott: And his obviously, obviously his answer is yes. [00:12:00] Another thing is imposter imposter syndrome. You know, even after those big wins, they get that voice that says, you know, you don't belong to be here. This isn't for you. Other people are deserving of this more than you and, and so on. And then another thing is struggling with control.

Scott: So high achievers, and you may relate to this as well, I, I need to do this. This is, this is what I need to do. I can't give it to anyone else. Uh, which then increases stress and pressure often. Uh, and it can very quickly limit growth, uh, even though, what's the word on paper? It might, it might seem like everything's going really well and impressive, but that can be a real shift.

Katie: And do you find that most people are coming when they feel burnt out or they are just, I guess, what is their pain point often when they're coming and seeking you out as a coach? 

Scott: It varies so much. Uh, but yeah, o often it's, it's a lack of, a lack of clarity. It's like, well, what's kind of next for me? Why can't I get put my finger on what's wrong?[00:13:00] 

Scott: Um, I'm not as confident as I once was. You know, these tend to be the, the pain points or they're stressed, they feel too much pressure. The relationships aren't, aren't working out exactly as they'd like them to be. So, yeah, it, it is a multitude of different things, but I would say that they, they're the common ones at the moment and it does change in different seasons.

Scott: And I think we have different seasons of life. So, uh, yeah. For example, in, in winter as an example, we may, we may see more people reach out to me. They say, I'm not, I feel like I haven't got many friends because maybe they're not out as much, and so on. 

Katie: Gotcha. Do you have a client that particularly sticks out like a transformation that you, uh, really wowed you or really impressed you?

Katie: Maybe 

Scott: all of them, huh? No, I'm joking. Um, no. So a, a client of mine, let's give you this example. Yeah. So he built a very successful business, financially secure. Um, and like I said earlier, you know, on [00:14:00] paper from the outside, you would kind of look at him and say, oh, he is got it all together. This is exactly what I would wanna be.

Scott: But privately, in his, in his own space, there was a lot of pressure. His confidence was, was, like I said earlier, one of the barriers. It was very much tied to the results that he was achieving. So if the business wasn't doing well. He didn't feel good. If the business was going brilliantly, he felt great. He felt okay.

Scott: But if he had a tough week, then there a lot of self-doubt, a lot of conf lack of confidence and anxiety. So what we did, we just, we, we separated it, like I said earlier, his self-worth from his success. So one of the areas that I like to dive into with that is, what do I believe to be true? So what did he believe to be true?

Scott: To have him having to need to prove himself all the time and, and realize that actually what mattered more was. Was himself and, and not just his success. And that was a big thing for him. And it was, it was powerful. So we set stronger boundaries. Uh, [00:15:00] he reccon reconnected with parts of his life outside of work, and then he started to actually perform better at work and enjoy it more.

Scott: So yeah, little bit more freedom, I think probably for him. 

Katie: I think it's difficult in today's day and age to be able, I mean, there's a fine line sometimes between wanting purpose per se and then getting to maybe attached to it potentially, that then it starts to drive you more than you are driving it, if that makes sense.

Scott: Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. It's uh, it's the world we live in, I think. It's very much I, I get, I get trapped in that, you know, drive for wanting to achieve, achieve more, more, more. And I have to understand that that's just an echo of something that I used to experience for within myself because I, I used to come from a place of not feeling good enough and not feeling safe.

Scott: So what I did was I did anything and everything to feel safe and to feel good enough. And that was, well, I need to, I need to try and be better, more, more, more. And that, that for me, even at the, the time of struggle when I was crippled with anxiety, that was, I attached that to physical [00:16:00] exercise. So I was very much about my physical body 'cause that made me feel good enough and it made me feel safe.

Scott: Whereas now, um, I look after myself, but from a healthy space, I know that it is not true, that I'm not good enough. And I've got a lot of. A lot to give and that allows me to strive for more, but from a place of abundance, if that makes sense. Rather than lack, 

Katie: this might be a tricky question, but to give people, because it is largely intangible, to give people a better sense of what that shift can look like.

Katie: Coming from a place of looking to the outside to create that sense of safety versus looking on the inside. How does that look and feel like you what? What does that look like now that it's coming more from internal? 

Scott: For, for me personally. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I suppose it's, it's just very, that is a good question, by the way.

Scott: But yeah, I think I, there's a more of a sense of peace and if things don't go my way, then I. I overcome them very quickly. I, I'm, I'm able to look at a situation and understand that there's nothing, [00:17:00] most of the time it's not to do with me. You know, the, the, the external I can't control. And I remember hearing this, this quote, even if it comes to people and it's hurt people, hurt people.

Scott: Whereas if someone wasn't okay with me, if something didn't go quite well, I'd be like, oh, it's, it's all, it's all my fault. And that would make me feel not good enough. And then that would trigger me into a hole of. Anxiety and low confidence. But now I understand that, hey, it's, it's probably not me. I'm, I'm, I'm gonna take responsibility if I need to and the situation didn't work out, that's okay.

Scott: But actually I'm good. I, I'm at peace with that. Hope that answers that question 

Katie: does. Yeah. 

Scott: I think you, the more that you work on yourself and like I said, take responsibility, the more you'll, you'll start to, to experience those, those shifts. But it's. It's enjoying the, the, the, the positive changes that you have and not just letting them just pass because, uh, and that was actually something I saw from [00:18:00] Tony Robbins fairly recently is, is as, as we go through life, if something's.

Scott: Negative doesn't go. So it's limiting. We feed that, we're like, oh, that didn't feel good. And we kind of live those emotions and feelings in the body and think about it more, more than we should. And then, um, body and mind go, oh yeah, that doesn't feel very good. But when something's good, we go, oh, that was nice.

Scott: And then we move on. But actually we should feed that. We should give that energy because when we do that, then our body goes, oh, I liked that. You like that? That felt really good. Let's, let's visit that again. So, and that's what I like about talking about beliefs and why I really enjoy working on, around what we believe to be true.

Scott: Because if we just look at the world and what goes on in the world, I mean, if we're honest, all of that happens because of what someone believes to be true. So I've gotta change my, my belief system to align with where I want to go. But often if we're not where we want to be. And we are struggling in in life or a lack of confidence, then we're often feeding something we believe to be true that is limiting us.

Scott: So find out what it is by raising [00:19:00] awareness and then start to go about removing it and replacing it with something that is actually helpful and gonna help you go places. 

Katie: And ultimately, it takes work. Like you have to make the choice to do it and then do it again, and do it again, and do it again. And it's not gonna necessarily happen on its own, per se, until it becomes more of a habit.

Scott: Yeah, it's very true. Yeah, we, it, it does take time. I've spoken to many guys before and we'll, we'll sit on the call and they'll say, I wanna make a change. I'll go, great, okay. This is an initial conversation. Um, and then I don't hear from them and then I hear from them six months later and nothing's changed because it does take that commitment.

Scott: You need to show up, you need to do the work. It's not easy, but nothing is, if we're looking at life in general. It's not that nothing is easy, it's just that life doesn't come without challenge. So we've gotta kind of build ourselves up and be able to manage that as best as possible. And it does take commitment.

Scott: You've gotta show up day in, day out. 

Katie: Do you have any tips or advice on the, the commitment piece for people, especially [00:20:00] in today's world, where it's more of an instantaneous society in a lot of ways for a lot of people? 

Scott: Yeah. Well it's, it's like a, I suppose, like building a muscle. The way I kind of think about it, it's incremental steps.

Scott: Often we, we need to, when. People are trying to make change, and I used to do this myself. It's okay, well this, this is the big thing that I need to do. Well, that can be quite overwhelming, but we, and commitment, I need to commit to this big thing. And that, that is overwhelming and it can, it can actually have the, the opposite impact.

Scott: So what we should do, from my perspective, and something I do is I just small chunk, I take small steps. So if I'm committing to something, then I'll say, well, what's the first thing that I can do? And then what's the next thing? And it doesn't have to be huge. And then all of a sudden I'm, I'm where I need to be.

Scott: And it could be just doing something in that moment. So if I have an idea, I won't necessarily completely go away from what I'm doing, I'll just write it down. That's my commitment. I'll write it down and then I'll come back to it. But yeah, I would say start small, [00:21:00] small chunk and, and then the overwhelming feeling of committing to something is isn't as bad.

Scott: I remember talking to my, my daughter, so she's. Going, she's nearly eight. And when she was, I think she was probably about four or five, we was, we were going to the dentist. She had a dentist appointment and I noticed that she was a bit quiet in the morning. I was like, Hmm, interesting. And she's only, you know, four or five, so she can't really express, she was only four and five and couldn't express herself in the way that, that we as adults like, would like.

Scott: Um, and I said, is everything okay? Yeah. I said, oh, you seem a bit, seem a. Different this morning and she said, oh, I don't wanna go to the dentist. And I said, oh, she hasn't been, hasn't been exposed to like where, where people are often afraid of going to the dentist that she hasn't been exposed to that. But obviously there's something there.

Scott: She might have heard something. And, and I said to her, okay, well, I said, I imagine you are, you're thinking about being in the dentist chair. She was like, yeah, I am. Yeah. I said, okay, well, let's just, let's not think about that. [00:22:00] What's the first thing we can do now? She said, well get dressed. I was like, let's do that.

Scott: And she got dressed and I said, what's the next thing? She went, well, brush my teeth. I was like, okay, we'll do that, and then what's next? And then we will go downstairs. Yeah. And then in the cart and then, and all of a sudden she sat in the dentist chair. So that was just an example of just small chunking, taking the small steps initially, and then you build that habit, like you said, and all of a sudden it becomes much easier.

Katie: It's a really good example. I, I personally don't like going to the dentist either, so I relate to that. 

Scott: Yeah. Yeah. I, I was the same though. I was the same, but I never expressed it out outwardly. It was just always within, and I could feel it in my body and, uh, I, and I thought to myself, what do I believe to be true about the dentist?

Scott: Uh, I believe that it's, it's not a nice experience. Okay, well how, what's my brain gonna do when I start thinking about the dentist, where it's gonna give me problems? 'cause he doesn't want me to go 'cause it's trying to protect me. So I thought, well, what can I do then? What do I need to believe to be true?

Scott: To make it easier for me? Okay. The, the dentist is a, a [00:23:00] nice experience and I'll only be there for 20 minutes. And then all of a sudden I started to, to feel better about it. And I suddenly sit well once every year anyway. Really? Especially in the uk. 

Katie: Well, that's fair. To change gears a little bit, maybe among the men that you work with, have you noticed or found any themes or common mindset shifts that they're making?

Scott: Yeah, I think, oh, there's so, there's so many I'll be, I'll be honest. But one is to, to make sure that you've got the right people around you, people that are actually gonna support, and, and I think that is a big challenge for men often because they do think they need to do it on their own. It's changing.

Scott: It is, it is changing. Uh, but I speak to many, many guys and, and it is something I still have to work on that don't have that many connections around. Don't have. The support network. And it doesn't have to be, you don't have to share everything with everyone. Uh, it's not like that. It's, it's saying, okay, well who can I share [00:24:00] my challenges with?

Scott: What can I do to, to move through something? And, and, and is there anyone in my network? If not, can I go and find someone that in itself? Uh, so, so many of the guys that I will coach as soon as they say, yeah, I'm in, and we book that first session in, it's just like a weight lifts off their shoulders. So I would say try and build as best as possible an environment around you of, of people that can really.

Scott: Help you and then you'll, that, that in itself will create a shift and then come back to what you believe to be true and the language you're using. I can't express just how important it is around language, and if we are aware and we catch ourselves in the day, almost always, there'll be some limiting thoughts there that are gonna make you feel like rubbish or crap.

Katie: It sounds like you're, you're mentioning this idea that men tend to do more things, be more self-reliant or feel like they need to be more self-reliant, and is that because of the social conditioning of women may be conditioned a little bit more to seek support from [00:25:00] others and men? Less so, 

Scott: yeah, for sure.

Scott: Yeah, exactly. That we do, we do tend to keep it to ourselves, not always, and you know, obviously it's different for different types of people, but. Generally, yes, we will very much keep our thoughts to ourselves, uh, and, and not express. In any way really. And it will come through usually aggression or, or anger, um, rather than saying, Hey, you know, I've, I'm really struggling at the moment because by not expressing, it's just like being poked with a stick all day.

Scott: Imagine you don't feel good and you just got someone just poking you with a stick and you just brush it off, brush it off, brush it off, and at the end of the day you explode. You know that, that tends to be what happens. Whereas I think women in general will say, you know, that was really. Tough day. Um, whereas I know that I, my wife sometimes has to remind me of saying, you know, you look like you're, you're a bit tired today.

Scott: What, what happened? How'd it go? And then I'll open up a bit more. Um, [00:26:00] but there's, I think there's a misconception. Well, if I have to be vulnerable, I have to be open. I don't want to be vulnerable and open with everyone. Well, don't be, have a select few people that you feel you can open up to, uh, and talk to about things.

Scott: And you don't have to share everything with them. Just practice that, that experience go through that experience and be, ah, whew. That would, that did lift the weight actually. And I do feel better. Yeah. And, and see what transpires there. 

Katie: Would you say it's a little bit along the lines of sort of like asking for help or is there a different way to frame it that would make it feel maybe less vulnerable?

Scott: That's a good question. Showing strength, I would say that that is essentially showing strength. There's a, if that's anything that needs to shift, it's that when we talk, it's it's strength. Um, and, and I really admire that. You know, I've got women in my life every, I've got three younger sisters. I've got a daughter, I'm married, and my mom and my, my granddad, I'm, I'm surrounded by women in that.

Scott: I would say they're extremely, they're incredibly strong and, and one of the reasons for that, [00:27:00] I think it's 'cause they express how they feel. 

Katie: Well, thank you for your, your wisdom and for coming on and sharing your story and some of your strategies for building confidence. Do you have anything else that you'd like to share or add that you think might be helpful for folks?

Scott: I think for, for me, something simple that I like to keep stuff simple. There's loads of articulate, extravagant ways to create change, but there's a, there's a reason that we come back to the, the basic things and the, and the simple, because they work. So I say, when you're looking and you're reading these books, listen to these podcasts.

Scott: Look for things that you can implement that are simple, and look for those quick wins. Because as you gather those, you'll start to learn more about yourself and, and I would say that that's probably. One of the best places to start if you're looking to create change. Now, I'm not perfect. I don't pretend to be.

Scott: I've got challenges I still have to work through and I overcome, but I really make an effort and I, I do what I say I'm gonna do, and I think that's, that's [00:28:00] key. So yeah, I would say try that perhaps, and recognize actually confidence comes from action. Yeah, there's some inner work we can do to, for competence to become inside out.

Scott: But also the more that we take action, the more that we learn and the more that we learn, the more action we take. And the more that we take action, the more we become competent. Uh, because if I'm competent at something like podcast as an example, I've been on a few, it's been a while since I've been on some, but I'm starting to do it some more and, and I still, even though I did lots in the past.

Scott: I'm, I'm competent at it. I feel competence, so therefore my confidence is good. So the only way to get to that point is by taking action. It's like driving a car. You know, the reason you can, you're confident in it is 'cause you took action. So, yeah, 

Katie: and it can be a small action in the beginning and then you can build from there.

Scott: Oh yeah. It has to be small from, from my perspective, tiny. Take the tiniest little of action step and then build. 

Katie: Well again, thank you so much. If people are interested in finding out more about you, where they, where can they look you up? Where can [00:29:00] they find you? 

Scott: So probably best place is my website, um, further coaching.com.

Scott: I've got my Instagram, um, which I don't spend too much time on, but I'm starting to a little bit more, especially as everyone's talking about personal brand these days. So, um, uh, that's Scott d Hardyman and then I've got my LinkedIn as well, which is, um, Scott Hardyman. So if you feel you'd like to come and have a chat or ask any questions, then do so.

Katie: I hope this episode is helpful and provided some strategies and examples for overcoming self-doubt and becoming more confident. As an additional note, if you're ready to make a change in your career and don't know where to start, or it feels too overwhelming, check out. Take APE coaching.com to learn more about a one-on-one coaching program designed to help you navigate a career pivot.

Katie: Thanks for listening and take [00:30:00] care.