Quick Tip: What To Do With the "What Ifs"

Welcome to Take a Beat in three minutes where we explore a mental health or personal development topic in 180 seconds.

Today we’re exploring “what-if” thinking and how these thoughts, if they start to get out of control can take us down a rabbit hole of worry and overthinking. 

These are the types of thoughts that come up when we’re trying to anticipate the future, which is fair, it’s good to have a plan and be prepared and who wouldn’t want to know how everything is going to turn out and even how to avoid all of the painful, uncomfortable parts of life.

The only problem is that it’s just not possible to know how everything is going to turn out, and that can feel really uncomfortable. 

Dealing with Uncertainty

Most of us like a certain degree of certainty and when we’re thrown into an uncertain or unpredictable situation, our mind can start to overreacting to try and keep us safe and get us to anticipate worse case scenarios so that we can be prepared. 

So we might wonder what if this happens? What if that happens? What if I lose my job? What if everyone secretly hates me? What if I’m not good enough? And we could go on like that for a while if we’re unable to stop it. 

We can become somewhat consumed in our thinking, maybe even distracted from what’s going on in our reality or what we need to be doing. 

Also this type of thinking, again if it goes unchecked, can start to exacerbate the uncomfortable feelings you’re already feeling due to the uncertainty you’re experiencing. So you might become even more worried, or stressed or anxious. 

Essentially the “what-if” thinking is kind of piling on and making us feel worse, and when we don’t feel so good or when we’re more stressed or more anxious than normal, we don’t always show up as our best selves. 

Negative Side-Effects

It can affect our mood, it can affect decision making–maybe it’s harder to make decisions because we’ve got so much going on up here–we can feel more irritated and our tolerance for frustration can go down. It makes things more difficult. 

This is why it can be helpful to try and catch this type of thinking before it starts taking on a life of its own. 

One way to try and do this is to answer yourself. 

So if you have the thought, “What if I lose my job,” you could answer yourself with “If … then.”

“If I lose my job, then I will do xyz.” And start making a plan. 

You may never have to act on that plan, but coming up with potential solutions is going to help disrupt the thought pattern.  

It’s also going to help shift your focus away from all the worse case scenarios and toward what you could actually do about it, which is going to help you feel differently. You might even feel relief or a sense of agency maybe even a sense of hope. 

So if you notice a lot of “what-if” thinking, try answering yourself with “If … then” and see if it helps.

*Disclaimer: The information contained in this episode is for the sole purpose of being informative and is not considered complete. It should not replace consultation with a qualified professional.